EJ's Random Stories
by electricjellicle
Summary: Just random ideas that come to me on a whim. Yep, you should be worried.
1. An Unexpected Couple

Tugger scanned his eyes over his fan club. Ah, Victoria, snow white and cute. Electra, her tongue hanging out. Etcetera, squealing like a banshee. And then…ah, where was Jemima then? An incomplete fanclub? That would not do, not at all.

"Hey, you ladies seen my little dreamy girl?"

Etcetera's face scrunched into a pout. "What, Tugsy, aren't we enough?" Her huge eyes looked up accusingly at her idol.

"Oh, no, babydoll, don't take it the wrong way!" He wiped the angry off her face with a single pelvic thrust in her direction.

Leaving the three kits in joyful hysteria, he swaggered over across the junkyard to the boot, where, to his immense distaste, Alonzo sat, his arms wrapped tightly around a certain black, sweet-faced kitten.

"Care to share?" He gestured with his head towards Jemima.

Alonzo smiled genially. "Oh, no Tugger, I'm a gentleman, I treat girlkits with respect." He opened his arm and Jemima skittled off to join her friends.

"You see," Alonzo continued, "that's why the kitten's like me best."

Tugger was incredulous, "like you best? I'm, sorry, did I hear you right? Last time I checked, I had, look, 4 kittens in my fanclub. And you have…wait, just one."

Alonzo's smirk held firm. "That would be three. Victoria was all over me last ball, I'll have you know. And who was it dancing with me, while you were with Bomba? Wait a second, that was Etcetera. So that'd be a fanclub of three."

"I'm still one up on you."

"Yeah, but I'm younger. You watch, in a couple of month's the kits will all have forgotten you."

"And what makes you think that? What makes you think you can challenge the irresistable Tugger? Last time I checked, you had a mate."

"Cassandra's…just a friend. And I'm a better dancer, a better gyrator, a better singer, a better gentleman, a better fighter, and a better kisser."

"Oh yeah?" Tugger gave Alonzo a sharp shove back onto the car.

"Uhuh."

"No way." Tugger was actually genuinely worried now. What if Alonzo usurped him? What if pelvic thrusts weren't enough? What if what he said was true? Alonzo was, he admitted, roguishly handsome.

"Yep." Alonzo nodded smugly.

"Prove it." Tugger jeered, more certainly than he felt. This was his reputation at stake, after all.

Alonzo smiled wickedly, a smile that Tugger had often seen Alonzo give to queens. It gave Tugger an inkling of what it was like to be on the receiving end of Alonzo's charm and those dazzling blue eyes. And then their lips met.

Tugger stepped back, shocked by the intensity of it all.

"Proof enough?" That smile again, the grin that made Tugger dizzy.

"The kittens are yours." Tugger sighed, and then smiled back. "But you…you're mine."


	2. Valentine's Day

Sunlight was streaming into an alleyway where a little red tortie was waking up. Electra yawned and stretched. Just another boring monotonous day in the...**WAIT! It was Valentine's Day! **And she had a Valentine to send! Quick as a flash, she leaped off the rubbish bin and shook herself awake. Now, where had she put her card? Somewhere safe...of course, she'd hidden it behind a loose brick. She ran her paws along the wall, looking for weakness under the pads of her paws. She found it. Pulling the brick out of the wall, she lifted her Valentine's day card out of it's hiding place.

She'd made it many days in advance, with the assistance of Bombalurina, who was worldly and wise when it came to toms. "Spray this on it," the scarlet queen had said as she handed Electra a strong-smelling bottle of perfume, "your Valentine'll love it." Electra had accepted gladly, spraying copious amounts of the stuff on her card. Now time had passed, and the harsh smell had faded to a gentle scent. Electra sniffed it approvingly.

Just then, Tumblebrutus came down the street. He whistled a merry air as he walked, his paws clicking on the concrete. He waved happily to Electra as he passed her. He wished he had the guts to ask her out to The Pothunter's sometime, but he was such a coward. "Happy Valentine's Day, Lec!" Tumble masked the affection in his voice rather well, and gave a cheery smile.

"Hey, Tumble, wait!" Electra called out to the brown and white tom. Tumble noticed a pale pink envelope in her paw. A Valentine? His heart beat accelerated a bit. "D'you mind doing me a favour, and delivering this to Pouncival for me? Don't tell him it's from me!" Electra winked.

Tumblebrutus' face was wiped off all its former cheer. He stared in disappointed. Pouncival. So that's who the Valentine was for! Electra and Pouncival were always arguing, and Tumble had guessed they didn't like eachother. He had been wrong. He noticed Electra was staring at him funny, and he quickly fixed his expression. "Oh sure, Lec."

"Oh, thanks so much! Luv ya, Tumble!' Electra grinned her cheeky grin and waved to him as he disappeared around the corner, the envelope in his patchy paw.

No you don't, thought Tumblebrutus sadly as he started off to find his friend

While Tumble arrived, Pouncival was jumping and spasming as he was prone to do when excited. "Mornin' Tumble, you'll never guess what I'm gonna do-"

"Wait, buddy, I've got a letter for you." Tumblebrutus passed Pouncival the fragrant envelope. Pouncival frowned. "A Valentine? For me? Cool!" He slid the card out of its dainty packaging and read the words.

_Roses are red, _

_Violets are blue,_

_Tugger is cute,_

_But not as cute as you!_

The rhyme's a bit off, thought Pouncival, but the feeling's there. I've got a Valentine! But who could it be. Obviously, someone in Tugger's fanclub. He gave the note a curious sniff. Where did he recognise that aroma from? **Of course! Bombalurina! ** His heart nearly stopped.

"Oh sweet Heaviside, its from Bombalurina, isn't it?" Pouncival bounced up and down like someone had been at him with a tazer. "Oh man! I'm right, aren't I Tumble? I'm Bomba's Valentine, I'm Bomba's Valentine!" He said in a sing-songy voice, totally blissful.

"Um...I'm not supposed to say." Tumble murmured quietly. Bombalurina! Poor Pouncival was totally delusional if he thought Bomba would ever pay him attention.

"Oh that's ok, I know anyway. I'm gonna go right up to her and..."

Tumble zoned out as Pouncival formed his master plan. He felt sad for his friend, who was in for public humiliation if Bomba rejected him. And he felt jealous of Pouncival. But, in the bitter pit of his heart, he felt just a little bit...happy. Happy that Pounce and Electra weren't a couple today. He felt guilty for being so mean, but there it was.


End file.
